It’s been a couple of weeks since I’ve left home to clear my head and reconnect with a great friend. In the time since, I’ve done a lot of work out in the hot sun and have had plenty of time to think about some things that were on my mind.
I’ve spent the last couple of days really trying to narrow down my brand direction for Skyward Mind, and get a better handle on exactly where I want to take the business in the future. And one thing that I just can’t get out of my head, is how personal business really is.
I always smirk when I hear someone say “It’s just business. It’s nothing personal.”
I smirk and then I think “What the fuck did I just hear?”
If business is anything at all, then it’s definitely personal. It is far more personal than most people realize. I believe that one of the reasons people struggle so much is because they have that stupid idea in their minds that business is a completely separate concept from anything personal in life, but that stupid idea doesn’t even make any sense.
Business is definitely personal, and the faster people realize and accept that as truth, the faster they will begin to see things more clearly.
Your business should have some sort of specific mission behind it, some sort of specific goal to be achieved. It needs to have some very clear and defined principles that it stands by, some very clear characteristics that define it. In other words, your business has to stand for something, and that something has to really matter to you a whole lot. If it doesn’t stand for something, then it’s not business, it’s just bullshit.
As I’ve spent these last couple weeks clearing my head and refocusing myself on the future, I’ve had so many personal issues cross my mind. And something that has always struck a chord with me, is when people offer unsolicited advice. I saw a Facebook post the other day that reminded me of this concept.
People are so quick to tell you what they think is wrong with your business when they don’t have clue what they are talking about, when they don’t even know what you do in the first place, and when they don’t even know what they are even saying. My ex is a perfect example of that.
I remember her trying to tell me that I needed to fix something on an old website I used to have, so I said “Do explain in detail exactly what you mean and why it matters to me” and I heard nothing but crickets chirping.
And I’ve had people say really, really, really stupid things to me about business for no apparent reason other than to hear the sound of their own voices because they wanted to feel right about something. But when you call them on their words, or just flat out disagree with a proper counter, all they do is sit there like a deer in the headlights. My former business partner is a great example of someone that said stupid shit all the time.
I remember trying to explain to her the literal concept that “You cannot have a separate business with your boyfriend that is the exact same type of business that you have with me, and operate that business in the same city, at the same time, from the same fucking location.”
Her response was “But why? Why can’t I have this business if it’s got nothing to do with Skyward Mind?”
“What the actual fuck?!” I screamed. “It literally has everything to do with Skyward Mind! It’s the exact same fucking business!”
And then she had the fucking lady balls to mention the phrase “Non-Compete Agreement” like I was the one that needed to hear it. So needless to say, I told her how I felt about that.
So why am I bringing up these issues from my past in the first place?
I’m bringing them up because they prove a point.
1. I don’t like when clueless, inexperienced people try to tell me how to do something when they don’t even know how to do what they are trying to tell me to do in the first place.
2. I am quick to get aggressive when someone crosses a line they shouldn’t cross because they are just ignorant of the actual facts of the matter.
Do not mistake this to mean that I cannot take criticism. I can take criticism all day long. It’s part and parcel to learning. But here’s another great example of what I am talking about that pisses me off.
People who do not have online businesses have seen me on Facebook and said things like “All you’re doing is looking at Facebook. How is that work?”
My blood is already boiling at this point.
Or someone sees me watching a video, and the only thing they perceive is that I am a guy watching a video of “a pretty girl with sunglasses and a hat” and they comment “All you’re doing is trying to check out that pretty girl.”
What the fuck did you just say?!
This infuriates me because it shows just how fucking stupid and clueless some people are about business in modern times, but they sure are quick to tell you what they think is right for you and yours.
It’s so upsetting because people that should be using Facebook for business are still perceiving it to be this “place for kids to hang out” instead of “an incredibly powerful platform to network and grow a worldwide brand…among other things.”
And why come with some bullshit about “a pretty girl with sunglasses and a hat?” I don’t give a damn what the girl looks like, and that’s not why I clicked the video to watch it in the first place. I clicked the video because of the big fucking title next to it that says “15 Facebook Live Tips for Entrepreneurs” or something like that.
But ignorant, clueless fucktards can’t see the giant capital letters for the title. All they see is “a pretty girl with sunglasses and a hat.”
But James, the title of this blog post is “Business is Personal.” What’s any of this got to do with business being personal?
The answer is simple.
It’s got lots to do with it. When people say stupid things to me like the pretty girl in the hat comments, I take it as a personal attack against me.
You see, when someone makes comments like that, they are making them for a reason. If someone tells me that I am just wasting time watching a video of a pretty girl because I just want to check her out, they are telling me that I am a shitty person with no goals, no smarts, and no future. They are telling me that I am stupid, and they are telling me that I am just like everyone else. At least that’s how I perceive it.
They see me a certain way because that’s what they are used to seeing in their own lives. They see me as a shitty and stupid minded waste of life staring like a zombie at a screen because that’s what they are used to seeing in their daily lives; shitty and stupid minded wastes of life.
Therefore I am quick to draw a very, very, very clear line in the sand that I am nothing like the scum they are referring to. And yes, I definitely get offended when someone tries to speak down to me in a condescending manner. That’s one of the reasons I am not very nice sometimes.
I get aggressive when I feel threatened, and there’s a word that describes that reaction….Oh yeah! It’s called being a man!
Business is personal. If someone says something to you because they think they can get away with it, and they think they can shove you into the same group as the majority of mindless, goal-less fucktards in this world, then you have a duty, an obligation, and a responsibility to stand up and say something back loud and clear.
I don’t mean stand up and curse them out either. There’s a time and a place for the expletives to fly, but the point is, don’t ever let someone put you into a category that you don’t belong to.
Business is very personal.
What you allow someone to get away with to your face says a lot about your mentality for business, and whether or not you actually care about yours.
You must separate yourself from the masses. You must elevate yourself to a whole new level so you are clearly and absolutely nothing like the majority of the crowd.
For me, people’s bullshit comments trigger me to want to try even harder. And they trigger me into defensive mode, or offensive mode depending on how I feel at the time. I absolutely cannot just sit idly aside when someone is speaking to me in a way that is condescending or downright offensive.
I know for a fact that many people who read this might think “What’s the big deal James? Why don’t you just ignore them?” But you see, that’s the whole point.
You need to be so obsessed and so focused on becoming successful that you notice what most people fail to notice. You need to be so obsessed that you zero in on things that most people fail to even realize. So many people receive bullshit comments daily, and are OK with them because they are average minded and mediocre people.
Well fuck mediocrity!
And that is why you must separate yourself from the crowd!
If being compared to average and mediocre doesn’t bother you, then I question your ability to be successful. It should eat at you like an acidic burn if someone dares to compare you to average.
It should be so deeply ingrained in your mindset that you are so far above and beyond average, that if someone does try to compare you in some way, that you release the Entrepreneurial Kraken on them and draw a line so thick and unforgettable they don’t know what hit them!
Granted, to do this you must constantly develop your skill set. You must always be learning. You must always be trying to improve yourself in some way at all times. This striving for success is what separates you from the rest of the crowd.
And if you want to make a lot of money, then you’re going to piss a lot of people off, so get to it! And let them know how you really, really, really feel inside, because Business is Personal.